The Sound of One Man Spitting!

WARNING: Face pulling, nausea and "oh, gross" comments may occur from reading the following material.

As I was heading to work today I was in my usual state of focus; I.E: walking with intent at a swift pace whilst my mind races through a hundred ideas at once. To the passer by it may have appeared that I was oblivious to any goings on outside of my world. But they were wrong!

My reverie was broken by an expulsion of saliva that made the earth shatter and the clouds shake.Hccaaahhhcch.....tssstt!

This is not a variety of the sneeze, which I have blogged about before.........no..........vocalise this sound and I give you the sound of one man spitting.Why, oh why do men spit? Yes, I know women do it too but in all honesty it's the men who are the main offenders. It is one of the most disgusting habits that humans have and I am constantly repulsed by the visual and aural assualts that are forced upon me when I am out and about.

I have recently discovered that a friend of mine is a spitter. We were walking somewhere from A to B and whilst the spits were regular, they were void of the usual preparation and build up of the volcanic eruption about to take place. All I heard was the "tssstt" of the saliva passing through his teeth and the "splat" when it hit the ground. Upon our return, I felt it was my duty as a short tempered woman to ask "Why do you do that?????" His response was innocent and candid, "I just produce a lot of saliva." Or words to that effect.

There is absolutely nothing wrong with that and it is perfectly understandable, however, wouldn't you just swallow? I don't know, I do not have this affliction.

Anyway, his is not the type of spitting I find that offensive. I'm talking about the snorting, guttural gathering of saliva from the depths of your throat that have been sitting there ready to be discarded at any opportunity available, I.E. the ground, anywhere, anytime. I'm also talking about the mucous gatherers such as those you hear on the train. A tissue short of a blow job and you could be forgiven for thinking you were in a pig sty at dinner time. People with colds/flu, hayfever or just a need to rid themselves of the excess walk our streets every day. At the risk of sounding racist, here we go; older Asian men and women are prime examples. I do understand this is part of the culture but it doesn't make it any less offensive for me and that's that.

So think twice next time you are about to spit please. We walk on it everyday trudging along the footpath which is no big deal but think about this next time you are in a busy park and decide to take a rest. You sit down on the grass, put your arms back to support you and your hand touches something wet............